My Unofficial Safety Techniques
MLA Citation
Anonymous. “My Unofficial Safety Techniques.” BGSU COVID-19 Stories. BGSU University Libraries, 15 Feb. 2021, lib.bgsu.edu/COVID19stories/items/show/1763. Accessed 29 Mar. 2024.
Share
Title | My Unofficial Safety Techniques |
---|---|
Description | Through the pandemic I have adopted a few techniques I use for safety. I have no idea if these actually help, but they make me feel slightly safer so for my mental health I do them. Maybe some grad student can get a grant to test these out sometime in the future and see if the work or something. Maybe will get a kick out of the stupid stuff I do. That will make writing this worth it. NONE of these are a replacement for wearing a mask and social distancing. Listen to the doctors. PREPERATION TECHNIQUES: Outdoor Prep Wash thermometer, dry thermometer, take temperature, mouthwash and record temperature on chart, Don KN-95, bend wire seal to fit, don 3 ply surgical, bend wire to fit overtop, don glasses (Corrective, not safety glasses, wearing glasses before putting on the mask makes the seal harder to keep intact), test seal with obnoxiously bad smelling hand sanitizer they sell at the student union. If I can’t smell it I’m good. BONUS: Smelling like vodka and weird perfume helps disgust the massless away. The Decontamination Routine Wash hands, mask off, trash mask, wash hands, blow nose, mouthwash, remove exposed exterior clothes set, wash glasses, spin-dry glasses, decontaminate additional items if needed (Typically phone), wash hands, bathe, Wash face, wash ears, dress in home clothes set, wash hands, blow nose again, wash hands. SECRET BREATHING TECHNIQUES: Things I do beneath the mask to make myself feel safer when social distancing isn’t possible. This is almost exclusively when some narcissist without a mask^1 decides to violate my NAP and get within my 6ft no go zone. Hold the breath Just stop breathing while around people and get away asap. My idea here is that there is less pressure from inhaling to pull material through mask. Direct breath If prolonged contact is unavoidable, I can direct my breath through one side of my mouth, away from them. This buys me like an inch, but maybe it helps The Pogchamp Duckface By making a cross between a duckface and a pogchamp, I can force my upper lip nearly seal my nostrils. As it is concealed by my mask there is no embarrassment. DISTANCE TECHNIQUES: The About Face Sometimes on a narrow sidewalk, the drunken man with no mask will begin to approach you, slurring his speech. In such cases I have instead chosen to walk back and find an alternate route. In one instance I ended up jaywalking, as I was crunched and there was no traffic at the time. Build the Wall In a grocery store some people will queue behind you like normal, ignoring distance. This is why in line you should leave your shopping kart behind you. The person in front won’t go backwards more than the belt, and you can force the person behind you to stay in their place by blocking them out of your personal space. GTFO If a place won’t enforce the rules, they don’t deserve your money. Get out. Leave the stuff you were gonna buy inside and just go. As far as I’m concerned, the maskless are the same level of danger as the people who let their muzzle point at another person or fail to exercise trigger discipline. It’s all fun and games till a lack of safety discipline leads to a stupid, preventable screw up. The virus weaponizes its hosts, and if you think about it, the uninfected are just unloaded guns. But anyone who’s learned about guns the right way knows that you treat every gun like it’s loaded, even when it’s not and ESPECIALLY when it’s not. Any range worth its sold kicks out morons like that. Same goes for stores. NOTES: ^1: Doesn’t include people who have a medical reason which prohibits them from wearing a mask. However the people I’ve heard of with such conditions are either scared out of their mind for their lungs and don’t recklessly approach people, or have some other reasonable justification for not wearing a mask like a mental illness. I have nothing against such people, but it’s also obvious that ~20%-40% of people at a given location don’t ALL fall into those categories either. Being weak willed isn't an excuse. |
Creator | Anonymous |
Date | 2021-02-14 |
Place | Bowling Green (Ohio) |
Rights | |
Language | eng |
Identifier | https://lib.bgsu.edu/COVID19stories/items/show/1763 |
Type | Still Image |